This is why I don’t handicap horses at the track. My predictions are so hardly ever accurate.

Y was late for court, again, but at least they didn’t immediately issue a bench warrant for his arrest. But that did mean sitting through everyone else’s continuances to April 12 before they circled back to Y. The public defender was away for training, so someone was filling in for him. Her name was called several times, and I’m sure this isn’t it, but each time this is what I heard: Miss Dildo. Maybe it looks better if it’s spelled, rather than pronounced.

So everyone got continued, except one woman who opted to plead not guilty and move forward with a trial. That got set for August — those wheels just keep spinning faster, don’t they?

Eventually Y’s case was called, and he was told he was not eligible for the public defender, and he should have been notified of this on Monday. Monday is the day he told me they had accepted his application. Perhaps accepting the application is different from evaluating it. I have no idea what he was really told on Monday.

So he opted to plead guilty. The assistant DA dropped two of the counts in exchange for a guilty plea on a second DUI, and after checking with me to ensure that Y had successfully graduated from drug court, told the judge that he would recommend drug court again.

Sentencing is up to the judge, not the DA, and there are mandatory minimums of 10 days in jail, 48 hours of community service and fines, but the judge set sentencing for May to give Y time to complete an alcohol evaluation and drug-court screening.

I don’t know exactly how the district court charge (where the judge is the one who presides over drug court) plays into all this, but this morning certainly didn’t go as I predicted. You won’t find me at the race track this afternoon.

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