Singy Eaty Time

In an episode of SpongeBob, Squidward, his play freshly rejected by an actual producer, requests staging it during dinner at the Krusty Krab restaurant where he and SpongeBob work. SpongeBob ponders what to call this and, rejecting Squidward’s suggestion of “dinner theatre,” settles on “Singy Eaty Time” — despite a lack of music in the […]

Lip Service

Today is Memorial Day, traditionally a day of entitlement. It’s the day we use to mark the beginning of summer, and fill it with time off from work, and with beaches and barbecue. I believe that was the intent even at the beginning, in the aftermath of the Civil War. What? This is a day […]

Gunnison Sphinx

Ha! You — or maybe it was me — didn’t think I would remember, but I did. It wasn’t any writing that jarred my memory loose; it was reading the local newspaper and happening across the article on how Western Not State hopes to pay for Corona — an article that came out before the […]

No Mourning the Morning Pages

I spent two days working on a post that kept getting interrupted and now is probably moot. Last night I feel I had a different topic for this morning, but of course I didn’t do anything necessary, like write it down, and this morning all I have is a niggling sense that I had something […]

Country Living

You have no idea how many times I feel, without ever having devoted much time to watching the show, like — I was going to say Eddie Albert, but maybe it’s Eva Gabor — on Green Acres. Maybe I mean Eddie. He was the one who wanted to live on the farm; he just wasn’t […]

Which End is Up, Again?

My dad was not always kind when speaking about his college students. I doubt very much he said it to any of them directly, although there might have been one or two that at least tempted him, but at home we were very familiar with the expression, “He doesn’t know his ass from his elbow.” […]

Explosive Anniversary

Forty years ago yesterday, Mount St. Helens blew its top in dramatic, well-documented fashion, taking with it 57 people, thousands of animals and about 230 square miles of forest. This was sort of expected, and sort of not. The devastation certainly wasn’t planned for, nor the loss of life, but scientists from the University of […]

The Natural(ist)

I hope you won’t think less of me for saying this out loud in semi-public, but: all geese look the same to me. Well, not all geese, but all geese of any given species, including whatever species it is that makes itself t’home here at Riverwalk each spring. This shouldn’t be so hard; there’s the […]

Pig Farming

A woman whom I worked with early in my Pat’s years put her finger right on it one day. I have no idea what thing (or things, most likely) I was trying to do, or planning to do, or starting to do, but in half-exasperation, half-accusation and half (yes, that’s too many)-realization, she said, “You’re […]

Justin Credible

Today, although it probably won’t really seem like it, my nephew Justin graduates high school. There won’t be a ceremony, per se, just a couple of words you don’t usually like to put together: a school drive-by to pick up his diploma amid congratulatory honks. No speeches, no robe, no tassle-turning, no after-party. You’re done, […]