The Cold Spaghetti of My Life

Today is Saturday — or at least, it’s Saturday as I start this — and for the first time in a month, I do not have to be at work, a sporting event, or a social occasion. I am sitting here without any overt obligation. They’re there, lurking around the edges: Oz and I need […]

Change in the Weather

Just so you know, I didn’t overpack. The sky was leaden Tuesday, heavy with the threat of rain, and I had football games to time. Otherwise this threat would have been a promise, the potential of some badly-needed moisture. It’s funny how perspectives change based on our personal needs, hm? Even though the forecast had […]

The Cows of It All

There are probably 20 tabs open in assorted browsers on my assorted computers of stories I mean to read but which — as now is becoming clear — I might never get to. All of these tabs are stories about climate change, and while I feel I ought to read them, as a citizen of […]

Grass Day

I try to be flexible, although I mostly fail at this. On a physical level, my body knows no flexibility: the best I’ve ever been able to manage is touching my kneecaps, not my toes. A yoga zen master I am not. But if there was ever a day that called for flexibility, yesterday was […]

Implausible Deniability

I had this post 90% ready to go when my Day of Remembrance began Saturday. Who would have thought it could go out of date right away? I figured there was a body, but wasn’t really expecting them to find one so soon, if ever. Way back when we were all young, a hand-held piece […]

Herd Immunity

Sometimes the deer come into our yard one or two at a time, but other times, like this morning as I pulled back the curtain to come eye-to-eye with a grazing buck, there are more of them than you’d think. Following an unexpected rain and in the pre-dawn, the deer were the same color as […]

The Science of Belief

I didn’t forget you all, honest: I’ve been working on this for three days. It’s not worth the wait, and yesterday I read that “science” is only 400 years old, which sent me to the dictionary, where I learn that science is “the systematic study of the structure and behaviour of the physical and natural […]

God’s Football Team

While the rest of the country marks the solemn occasion of the 20th year since the terrorist attacks along our East Coast, those of us in Gunnison have a second sad event to commemorate on this same day. Fifty years ago, a bus carrying the Gunnison High School junior varsity football team set off over […]

All Part of the Game

Fall has fallen upon us, whether I’m ready for it or not, and with it comes a school year pretending to be normal. This includes sports, which includes middle school volleyball and football. While I have threatened, every year for at least 10, to retire from my officiating duties, I somehow always pull my whistle […]

Logistical Nightmare

Let’s say I could use an easy $10,000, so I decide to head to Texas and find me a woman in her seventh week of pregnancy getting an abortion so I can sue her provider and get my 10 grand, because I imagine she has harmed me and I thus am entitled to the money. […]